9. After you get a free toaster, the bank president flees to Israel.
8. Your monthly statements are handwritten from a prison cell.
7. When you want to make a withdrawal, clerks suddenly don’t speak English.
6. You notice the front door to the vault is the back door to the building.
5. Your safety deposit box is a Dunkin’ Donuts carton addressed to Bernie Madoff.
4. All cash deposits go directly into the rabbi’s pants.
3. The song from the 80’s rock group Queen “Another One Bites the Dust” plays continuously
2. Toll-free customer service line is: 1-800-GET-HOSED.
1. The bank’s letterhead Reads: Bank President Ben Bernanke
–“Eddie from Cleveland”